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More of Myrtle Beach’s kookiest crimes

Don’t Tase her, bros!

There’s a Steven Seagal movie called “Above The Law.” We’re guessing these two didn’t see it.

On April 22, a federal grand jury in Florence indicted two former Marion police officers on charges of using excessive force against a woman, according to a press release from the Department of Justice.

Eric Walters and Franklin Brown were each charged with deprivation of rights. On April 2, 2013, the two are accused of using their Tasers multiple times on a woman. It’s not clear from the release just what led to the Tasers having to be used at all.

If convicted, both men face a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison.

We can’t help but wonder if everyone who might have gotten a speeding ticket from one of these guys are now going to file a formal grievance.

Bet You Can’t Break Just One

We have to wonder who was in charge of the dip.

In the early-morning hours of April 25, Myrtle Beach police responded to a hotel in the 700 block of North Kings Highway in reference to a 911 hangup, according to the incident report.

When officers went into the hotel room, they immediately noticed broken potato chips all over the floor, the report stated. The exact status of the French onion dip was not known.

Anyway, officers determined the two people in the hotel room lived together and had been arguing over who knows what. The argument reportedly never turned physical.

The hotel staff gave the woman occupant another room for the night, the report stated.

We’d just like an answer to the mutilated potato chips question. Were they Lays?

Of Love and Pit Bulls

Guys can sometimes be referred to as “dogs” in relationships, but it’s not necessarily an ex-boyfriend making the claim.

Myrtle Beach police received a complaint on April 25 from a woman who claimed her ex-boyfriend was harassing her and her current beau, according to the incident report.

The alleged victims were at the community kitchen that morning, when they reportedly ran into her ex. He told her she needed to keep a “leash” on her, “bitch-ass pitbull of a boyfriend,” the report stated.

The ex apparently didn’t like the way the new guy was looking at him. He added to his former flame that he would, “fuck him and her up,” according to the report.

At this time, no warrant was being sought against this pitbull fan. Although the report did note that he has been charged in the past with assaulting the woman.

Maybe he’s the one who should be wearing the leash. Or, at least kept in a crate.

You’re Gonna Learn Today

This is definitely one way to get people to pay attention to your views on improving education.

Keith VanWinkle, a candidate for Horry County School Board District 3, went from running for office to schooling a fugitive when he took down a man who tried to rob him on April 25, according to a press release.

The suspect, Joey Speaks, allegedly tried to rob VanWinkle. The candidate was able to subdue Speaks before calling the Myrtle Beach Police Department.

Speaks reportedly was a fugitive who has outstanding warrants in Iowa. He was charged with resisting arrest, being a fugitive, third-degree assault and battery and others, the release stated.

Taking down criminals and wanting to help ensure our youngsters get a better education? That’s called multitasking.

Over Here!

Perhaps this weapon of choice would serve as a distress signal if things got too dicey during the commission of a crime.

On April 27, Myrtle Beach police arrested Todd Hobble and charged him with armed robbery. When authorities placed him under arrest, he allegedly had a flare gun and some knives in his possession, according to the incident report.

Police initially saw the suspect and a woman sitting on a sidewalk in the 1400 block of Mr. Joe White Avenue with their feet in the bike lane. Officers told the two they couldn’t sit on the sidewalk and to get up.

Eventually, police recognized Hobble from a “be on the lookout” notice that was in reference to an armed robbery where the suspect used a knife, the report stated.

Additional units were called in, and Hobble was detained at the community kitchen.

Officers asked if the suspect had any weapons on him, and he reportedly indicated that he was carrying the flare gun and knives.

We have to wonder if there’s a boat owner out there whose emergency kit might be missing one particular item.