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Myrtle Beach’s kookiest crimes

By George, A Conspiracy!

This seems like a logical way of thinking, but apparently we were wrong.

So, let’s just say that if you’re already in jail, don’t plan your next criminal conspiracy before you’ve even been arraigned on the original charges.

On April 16, investigators with the Georgetown County Sheriff’s Office were told by the sheriff’s detention center personnel of a possible threat to a local bank and school, according to a press release.

Yep, three inmates were allegedly planning to create a scene at Waccamaw Elementary School’s rear sports field so officers wouldn’t notice that the nearby Wells Fargo Bank was being robbed.

Thankfully, the investigators caught wind of the plan and discovered Ryan Bonneau, Willie Edwards and Michael Hart were the three alleged perpetrators, the release stated.

No students or faculty at the school were in danger at any time, and there is no imminent threat.

All three suspects were already in the Georgetown County Detention Center on unrelated charges.

Are we the only ones thinking of the word “dumbasses” right now?

Not A Smart Use of Words

Racial slurs weren’t cool 100, 75 or 50 years ago. And they’re definitely not cool in 2014.

Granted, we wouldn’t recommend the following course of action either.

On April 17, Myrtle Beach police went down to the 1100 block of Ocean Boulevard after receiving a call that a man was unconscious on the sidewalk.

A large crowd surrounded the man, and officers found him with cuts to his left temple and right cheek and had small amounts of skin ripped away from his right hand, according to the incident report.

A witness said the injured man was very drunk and started using “sexually offensive comments” toward a girl walking by, the report stated. What, specifically, was said, we don’t know.

Then, he allegedly started throwing out racial slurs. You know the one we mean. It starts with an “N.”

Two other men didn’t take too kindly to these racial taunts, and started arguing with the guy, according to the report. They left, and it would seem all was coming to an end.

Not so fast. They reportedly came back with 40 of their friends, several of whom started beating the guy up, according to the report. The assailants allegedly left before police arrived.

There are some lessons to be learned here. One, and we all already know this, alcohol makes certain people do really moronic things.

Two, no matter how dumb someone acts, 40 against one isn’t right, either.

Not A Quality Easter Sunday

The Easter Bunny is known for coming into people’s houses late at night and leaving baskets full of delicious candies, brightly-colored eggs and jelly beans.

So, what do we call these guys? The Sith Easter Bunnies (that’s a “Star Wars” reference for all you non-nerds out there)?

In the early-morning hours of April 20, Easter Sunday, a few victims reported that their room had been broken into while at a motel in the 1500 block of South Ocean Boulevard in Myrtle Beach. The thieves reportedly made off with almost $12,000 worth of merchandise that included jewelry, a Gucci bag and a laptop, according to the incident report.

But wait, there’s more!

A woman who parked in the property’s parking garage reported that her car had been broken into and the thieves took away a set of car keys.

This particular set of keys was for another car that was parked at the woman’s home, the report stated.

People, don’t leave your valuables inside a locked car! It’s not as safe as you think.

And here’s hoping that next Easter is a little bit better for these folks. Perhaps an extra Reese’s peanut butter egg or something.

Just Ask J. Reuben

This is a curious name for a business, seeing as how it doesn’t really fit with the guy’s moniker.

Horry County man Henry Prickett Jr., was arrested on April 18 on sales tax charges, according to a press release from the South Carolina Department of Revenue.

Prickett, the president of Just Ask Hal LLC, a computer repair service in North Myrtle Beach, allegedly failed to file sales tax returns and pay taxes that were due. The company’s sales tax license was revoked in July 2012, the release stated.

But that reportedly didn’t stop Prickett, who is accused of continuing to operate the business without a license and making money in the process.

He faces a fine of $200 and not more than 30 days in jail, or both.

Just Ask Hal can’t help but remind us of “Better Call Saul.” And hey, Bryan Cranston starred in “Breaking Bad,” which is where that slogan came from. Cranston was also the star of “Malcolm in the Middle,” where he played a character named – Hal!