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3 little words can scare a guy

Dear Advice Diva:

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three months. The problem is, I was the first (and only one) to say, ''I love you'' and now I'm starting to regret it. Ever since then, he has been acting really distant and stopped being romantic. To spice things up I made him a special dinner on our two-month anniversary. I even got him a present! He didn't even bring me a card. That was two weeks ago. Now, he hardly ever phones unless I call him first. It seems like I am putting almost all the effort into the relationship. What should I do?

All Alone

Dear All Alone:

Desperation comes in all forms, even nice ones. You scared his noncommittal heinie by dropping the Three Words Every Guy Dreads -- and after two months, yet. Rule No. 1 in a New Relationship That You Want to Last Forever: Let him say it first. Guys like it when it's their idea (unless you're attracted to a mommy boy wimp with no gumption but that's a whole different story). And to make things even more terrifying, you cook him a Now It's Your Turn to Tell Me dinner and buy him a gift to celebrate being together for two whole months. It's a wonder he didn't bolt before dessert.

You may have lost this one for good. Remove him from your speed dial and move on. That means no ''I miss you'' texts with sad face icons, no asking his friends what he's been up to, and certainly no three-month surprise celebrations or anything that involves a teddy bear holding balloons, just to see if he's ready to start back up again. He's not. Really.


I have never been more embarrassed than when I was out with a large group of my friends for a high school reunion. We all went to a local bar to hang out when someone walked up to me and asked, ''Are those real?'' I was in a state of shock -- speechless! Then, to cover up his perverted comment, he said he was referring to my necklace. Yeah, right.

Rachel in Key Largo

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