Q: The man I’m dating lives at home in his parents’ basement. He moved back home after he got wiped out in his divorce.
He says he’s going to find his own place, but to me he seems awfully cozy. Every time we go out, he expects to come to my place and spend the night with me.
I think that’s very unfair. I don’t like the idea of him hanging out at my apartment and me not getting to go to his place. Besides, I have roommates, so it’s not like we have privacy where I live. I’m getting sick of this situation.
Steve: Maybe he has trouble performing in his mom’s basement.
Mia: You don’t say how long you’ve been dating. If it has only been a few months, give it time and watch to see if he’s actively looking for his own place or if he’s home for the long haul.
Something tells me you’ll know for sure by the time summer comes.
Q: I met this guy on a dating site six months ago, and we’ve been seeing each other ever since. Last week, I was helping him tidy up his place when I found a used condom in the cushion of his couch.
Since I’m on birth control, we haven’t been using protection, so it’s definitely not ours. I can’t tell how old it is. When I asked him about it, he just brushed it off. He says it’s from before he met me. I’m not so sure. This is keeping me up at night.
Mia: Silly girl, why aren’t you protecting yourself? You don’t know this guy well enough to be going raw dog. You need to get screened for sexually transmitted diseases immediately.
As for your guy, listen to your gut. It’ll tell you what’s what. Meanwhile, be smart and stock up on condoms!
Steve: I’ve found plenty of change between couch cushions, but this is something new. You have to ask yourself: “Do I want to be with a guy who’s a poor housekeeper? And a dog?”
Steve is a 50-something married man who’s been around the block. Mia is a younger, recently married woman with an all-together different attitude. They may not agree, but they have plenty of answers.